Parenthood, while fulfilling, is an endeavor that not every person wants to pursue. Those who wish to become parents have several avenues to choose from if they think the conventional route of carrying a child isn’t for them. Adoption is an example of said avenues.
If you’re an aspiring parent who has decided to adopt, you’re aware of how your parenthood checklist differs from those who have chosen to carry. The difference is especially noticeable in the earlier stages of preparation.
However, it should be noted that your checklist shares a few commonalities with theirs. A few of them have been listed below.
Establish a Support System
Adoption is no easy process, nor is it quick or linear. So aspiring parents should have another person aside from their spouse to boost their morale should things get tough.
Parents, siblings, other relatives, and friends – these are a few individuals to name if you wish to establish a reliable support system in these trying times. Another recommendation is to reach out to adoption support groups, where parents like yourself have probably experienced the same.
The support that these people can give during the adoption process is also helpful the moment you bring your child home. Parenting techniques depend on the person, but there’s always room to improve as you learn from other people.
Prepare Your Home
Let’s say you own a single attached house in Imus, Cavite. You consider this place your home, have left your marks, and made memories within its walls. The same cannot be said your child yet, given how it’s unfamiliar territory for them.
Making your child feel safe and welcome in your home is one of the best ways to help ease their transition into their new life, especially if your child is old enough to remember their previous one. If you have other kids, make sure that the newcomer is equal to them in terms of space and belonging. Doing this prevents feelings of alienation from blooming.
Remember not to go overboard with your design and shopping, either. Instead, carve out a space for your child and give them the power to personalize it in whichever way they want. Allowing them to do so provides them some semblance of control in an otherwise foreign and scary environment. It also gives you the chance to bond throughout the process. The same can be said for shopping for clothes and other personal items.
Spend Time With Your Child
Bonding time is a crucial component in the entire process, one you can have when filing for maternity leave. This leave grants you, at most, 30 days – all of which you can spend welcoming your child and creating a relationship with them.
The first thing to do is to establish permanency. Ensure your child that they’re here to stay. The shopping and room designing are a few activities that can help cement this fact. While actions work best, words are appreciated, too. Tell your child that you’re happy to have them around, but not too much that it overwhelms them.
Alongside permanency should be routines. Having a set daily routine to follow eliminates any surprises and will help your child settle in more quickly. Throughout the day, you can even include them in some chores, like cooking for the family. Doing so is another excellent way to make them feel included.
Throughout the entire process, try not to be too hard on yourself, even when you’ve done this parenting gig before. You know it, but it stands to be reiterated that every kid is unique and that it’ll take time to find a technique that will work on your child.